Selamat Hari Raya

Hari Raya marks the end of Ramadan for Muslims (one month of fasting dawn to dusk, water included). This year, it was celebrated on Tuesday October 24th and Wednesday the 25th. One of my students, Azlina (goes by Ina), invited me to her village in Kedah (a state) so celebrate with her and her family. She is 25, engaged (wedding is in early May!), is studying special education - deaf children specifically, has two older sisters, one older brother, and two younger brothers, and an insane amount of cousins. She and I get along really well and she has definitely become a good friend.

I got to her house on Sunday around 1pm. It is a traditional Malay house - wooden, lots of open spaces, metal roof, really cool windows. We just hung out that afternoon, talked, met family members, looked at photos. Then, around 4pm we went to Bazaar Ramadan - they have these all over the place during Ramadan. Vendors come and set up stalls and sell massive amount of food for "buka puasa," breaking fast. Her family has two stalls there so we said hello to them and helped out and bought food for dinner. Then we went home and ate a lot and sat around and talked.

Monday we woke up at 5am to have breakfast before sunrise. Then I helped her family make the desserts which they sell at Bazaar Ramadan, which took about 4 hours and involved lots of stirring and boiling and using a massive double boiler. I went back to sleep around 10am. We spent the afternoon napping, talking, reading, writing in my journal, watching tv - it was hot and when you can't eat or drink anything you don't have much energy (it was the last day of fasting). Then we went to Bazaar Ramadan again and I helped her family sell all their food which was quite an interesting experience. People were extremely curious about me because white people don't go to this place anyway, plus I was working at a stall...I'm sure I was good for business. It was fun, I got to meet tons of people, practice my Malay, and of course I was glad to do whatever I could to help. Then we went home and ate. I ate cow brains! Ina's mom bought it and it came in a plastic bag. It tasted ok...pretty much just like the sauce it was in. It was pretty mushy though; I think I would have liked it more if I did not know it was brains! Monday night was spent preparing for Hari Raya. We made tons and tons of ketupat - they take rice and cook it in coconut milk and then put it in these leaves and fold it up and boil it. I learned to fold the leaves!! We also put henna on our hands and cooked a bunch of various meat dishes.

Tuesday we had breakfast and got all dressed up. The family went to the mosque to pray while Ina and I stayed home and watched on tv and she explained it all to me. Her family came back around 11 and then the visitors started coming - friends, neighbors, relatives. We had to feed them all and meet them and socialize...pretty tiring and hectic. Then we started visiting neighbors and relatives and each house gave us tons of food. It was basically nonstop eating the entire day and it is all so good! I got to meet so many people. The kids wanted to play and teach me games, which was awesome, and the adults all wanted to talk...which of course posed a problem seeing as how my Malay is limited to small talk and they know no English. But it was fun and I loved meeting everyone and attempting to communicate. Later that night we played with fireworks, of which they had a ridiculous amount. Some just loud, some small, and some really big that shot up really far and were super bright.

Wednesday we had breakfast and then Ina's fiance came and we went to his family's house and then to her sister's house and then I went home. Again, more eating and meeting people. Her family is great! It was so comfortable being in her home. They of course made sure I was ok and had everything I needed but at the same time they didn't go out of their way too much. I was worried that they would feel like they had to entertain me and they didn't at all. It's hard to find hosts like that. Her mom is amazing and I wish I could have talked to her more. She told me, by the end of my stay, to call her "ma"! and they invited me to come back, very sincerely, and I hope I do...more than once. It was also really nice to be around a family...older people, kids, siblings. They were so open and welcoming and generous. I learned tons of Malay! They gave me so much food to take home too, and a bunch of mangoes that they picked from their tree. Yum!

Ina and I bonded a lot. She's definitely a person I could be very very close friends with. We have tons in common and just clicked really well. I slept in her bed with her so we had lots of late night conversations. At one point, she mentioned some movie she saw on tv when she was like 15 years old and she says she doesn't know why she remembers it and no one else has seen it and she started to tell me about it, and I've seen it! I was 12 and it was on tv and I remember it quite well also. It was a dumb movie, but it stuck for some reason in my 12-year-old head. So weird to think that we had such different experiences growing up and were so completely ignorant of each other's worlds, yet we saw the same movie and now I somehow am with her in Malaysia and in her home with her family sharing in family traditions.

So the plan now is to learn a lot more Malay and go back so I can actually speak with her family members and not just small talk. Ina and I have scheduled some lunches where she promises to give me lessons!